with Lori Rubenstein,
Life Coach and Divorce Mediator

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Husband Wanted: Running Out of Time

I'm a 40 year old, divorced professional. I've been single for 2 years, don't have any children but am still hoping that I can meet the right guy so I can start a family. A family is my top priority. I'm running out of time and really need to find someone who wants to get married and have children as much as I do.

Some of my friends have criticized me for my "obsession" with finding someone with this goal in mind. So far I haven't been very successful finding anyone. I tend to bring up marriage and children in the first few dates and that seems to end things. Maybe I sound a bit desperate, but my biological clock is ticking.

What do you think? Is it wrong for a woman to want children? Is there anything I can do to find men who are still interested in having them?

Hillary from Hawaii

Dear Hillary,

I think it is great that you know exactly what you want and that you are quickly sorting out the men who are not interested in the same desire to have children. I really feel your desire and pressure to have children before your biological clock runs out of time. Here's the key Hillary, families come in all different shapes and sizes. I bet that what you love about family is the warm, fuzzy, loving connections and all that great unconditional love that comes from children.

I suggest being open to noticing what else comes your way that can bring you those same qualities. Rather than coming from a place of desperation, come from one of being ready to share your love with children, they could be step children, adopted children, foster children.

Coach Lori